Legal Beagle

*Please note, “Legal Beagle” articles are general legal guidelines and are not meant to replace legal counsel. Please see your local Paralegal, or Lawyer for detailed case-by-case information.




Ontario Closing Costs Buying a Home or Condo Land Transfer Tax



There are several items that need to be attended to prior to closing a real estate transaction in Ontario. These include certain items imposed by the government; certain items that lending institution require as well as certain items that should be attended to in order to ensure clear title to the home or condo that you buy. In general, home buyers should budget up to 5% of the purchase price of their new home or condo to cover these various items. While these vary depending on the situation, typical costs include:



Survey


In most cases, the agreement of purchase and sale will have a clause asking for the vendor to provide a survey to the purchaser at their cost within a certain period of time. If the vendor does not provide you with an acceptable survey, you may need to obtain a new survey. Approximate cost: $650 . In most cases however, the survey is provided by the vendor.



Title Insurance


A title insurance policy can eliminate the requirement for a new survey. Title insurance is an insured statement of the condition of title or ownership of real property, at the time the policy is issued. Approximate cost: $250-275 (residential).



Title to Property


Title is the legal term for ownership of property. Buyers want "good and marketable" title to a property - good title means title appropriate for the buyer's purposes; marketable title means title the buyer can convey to someone else. Prior to closing, public records are "searched" to determine the previous ownership of the property, as well as prior dealings related to it. The search might reveal, for example, existing mortgages, liens for outstanding taxes, utility charges, etc., registered against the property. At closing the buyer expects property that is free of such claims, so normally they must be cleared up before closing. For example, the seller's mortgage will be discharged and outstanding monetary expenses (such as taxes and utility charges) will be paid for (or adjusted for) at closing.



Sometimes problems (or defects) regarding title are not discovered before closing, or are not remedied before closing. Such defects can make the property less marketable when the buyer subsequently sells and, depending on the nature of the problem, can also cost money to remedy. For example, the survey might have failed to show that a dock and boathouse built on a river adjoining a vacation property was built without permission. The buyer of the property could be out-of-pocket if he is later forced to remove the dock and boathouse. Or, the property might have been conveyed to a previous owner fraudulently, in which case there is the risk that the real owner may come forward at some point and demand their rights with respect to the property.



Who is Protected With Title Insurance?


Title insurance policies can be issued in favour of a purchaser (on new/resale homes, condos and vacation properties), a lender, or both the purchaser and lender. Lenders will sometimes require title insurance as a condition of making the loan. Title insurance protects purchasers and/or lenders against loss or damage sustained if a claim that is covered under the terms of the policy is made.



Types of risks that are usually covered under a title insurance policy include: survey irregularities; forced removal of existing structures; claims due to fraud, forgery or duress; unregistered easements and rights of-way; lack of pedestrian or vehicular access to the property; work orders; zoning and set back non-compliance or deficiencies; etc. For a risk to be covered, generally it has to have existed as of the date of the policy. As with any type of insurance policy, certain types of risks might not be covered, for example, native land claims and environmental hazards are normally excluded. Be sure to discuss with your lawyer what risks are covered and what are excluded.



The insured purchaser is indemnified for actual loss of damage sustained up to the amount of the policy, which is based on the purchase price. As well, some policies have inflation coverage, which means that if the fair market value of the property increases, the policy amount will also increase (up to a set maximum).



How Long is the Insurance Coverage?


In the case of title insurance covering the purchaser, title insurance remains in effect as long as the insured purchaser has title to the land. Some policies also protect those who received title as a result of the purchaser's death, or certain family members (e.g., a spouse or children) to whom the property may have been transferred for a nominal consideration.



In the case of title insurance covering a lender, the policy remains in effect as long as the mortgage remains on title. A lender covered under a title insurance policy is insured in the event the lender realizes on its security and suffers actual loss or damage with respect to a risk covered under the policy. Lenders are usually covered up to the principal amount of the mortgage.



The premium for title insurance is paid once (at the time of purchase). Generally speaking, in Canada the purchaser of the property pays for the title insurance, though there can be situations where the seller pays for it. Some policies automatically cover both the purchaser and lender; others will cover both for a small additional fee.



Protection and Peace of Mind


Title insurance can help ensure that a closing is not delayed due to defects in title. And, if an issue relating to title arises with respect to a risk covered under the policy, the title insurance covers the legal fees and expenses associated with defending the insured's title and pays in the event of loss



Land Transfer Tax


The Land Transfer Tax is payable on all purchases. The tax is calculated on the purchase price of a home according to a specific formula.


Visit: http://www.rev.gov.on.ca/en/tax/ltt/index.html



Legal Fees



Legal fees will vary according to the lawyer. Shop around, this should be $600 to $800, plus Disbursements.



Disbursements


Disbursements are costs that you lawyer will have to pay on your behalf, such as registration fees, photocopies, etc. Approximate cost: $400 to $600.



Statement of Adjustments


The purchaser and the vendor are each responsible for their share of taxes, fuel, and utilities. These costs will be reflected in the statement of adjustments which the lawyer puts together. Approximate cost: Varies depending on type of property (condo vs. freehold) and time of year.



Home Insurance


Home insurance premiums will vary from one insurance company to another and according to your insurance needs. In a condominium, the building insurance is included in your maintenance fees and does not form part of the closing costs, unlike a house purchase. Approximate cost: Varies



Mortgage Application


Your lending institution may charge a fee for processing your mortgage application. Approximate cost: Varies



Mortgage Appraisal


Approximate cost: $200. This may be waived depending on how you negotiate.



Home Inspection


Prior to buying a home, you should have a home inspection performed to identify any significant structural, electrical or plumbing problems with the home. Some lending institutions require that you have a home inspection completed before approving financing. Approximate cost: $200 - $450 tax.



Status Certificate


Prior to buying a condo, you should request a Status Certificate. This document provides detail on the Condo Bylaws, Rules and Regulations, as well as Finances. Any In-suite restrictions or common element restrictions are also detailed in the Status Certificate. Most importantly, it includes information on the condo's Reserve Fund, which is the amount the condo corporation has set aside to cover unexpected expenses. The Status Certificate is usually paid for by the seller. Approximate cost: $100.



Be prepared for all of the above fees ahead of time and know your budget in advance to avoid headaches, or worse, a deal falling through.



~Donna Kaye~



© Copyright, 2010 Main Street Magazine/Rain Enterprises


As seen in the April Issue of Main Street Magazine.


Printed in Canada, ISSN: 1920-4299 by Rain Enterprises



If you would like to find out how to receive your FREE copy of MSM go to http://www.mainstreetmagazine.net/



Quick Tips

Spring, the time that we roll up our sleeves and give the heave-ho to the hibernating dust bunnies that we have let slumber during the winter months. Now, we are full of positive energy flow from that great power- the sun.


Step one, involving major cleaning projects is to have the CD prepared with all of your favourite tunes to keep you smiling as you go. Do not forget- the volume will need to be loud!


Step two is to go through each room with a pen and paper and make a list of what needs to be done, and what you want to do. Wants for example might be paint or buy new blinds, a need is to get a storage bag ( or cardboard box) for the new winter bedding you bought, clean the switch plates in room A, but necessarily in room B.


Once you have been to the store and purchased the cleaning {please consider buying green/earth friendly products} and storage products that you need from the list you created above, assemble all of the cleaning supplies and tools you need. Tools is a fancy word for mop, pail, cleaning rags, gloves etc. And that old baggy t-shirt you have at the back of the closet that you pull out for such occasions as this.


Start at the top and work your way down so you are not tracking any dirt into the cleaned areas. Always dust the same way, start at the top and dust down! Check your list where you have added items like clean all of the light plates, windows, and hard surfaces, tackle the drapes, base boards and floors.


If you are the type who likes to clean your home one room at a time, the rule is: Don't leave until you are done! That means you bring all of the cleaning supplies with you, plus several bags or storage boxes marked "trash," "store away," "goes to another room," and "give away.”


By the way- for all those items you plan on giving away, check out a new group on yahoo called Freecycle, there is probably one in your area. http://www.freecycle.org/ you can post all of your give away items on the site, and others contact you for a pick up time, it is a great way to 1. Keep things out of dumping sites and 2. Give to others in need. All items are offered free of charge. Please read the rules and regulations for the group in your area before coming a member.


Also, be sure to keep lots of liquids handy for you, spring cleaning is hard work. Personally, I always have a blender of daiquiris on the go, but if you prefer water, well-- that is an option!


Happy Spring cleaning all!


Janice Collins


© Copyright, 2010 Main Street Magazine/Rain Enterprises

As seen in the April Issue of Main Street Magazine.

Printed in Canada, ISSN: 1920-4299 by Rain Enterprises


If you would like to find out how to receive your FREE copy of MSM go to http://www.mainstreetmagazine.net/





Lily's Garden





Welcome my kittens to my garden once more. This month we have a hunky fighter to play with. Canada’s very own…Georges St-Pierre

This 27-year-old Canadian Ultimate Fighter Champion is considered to be the #1 ranked 170 lb (77 kg) fighter in the world. But alas, if watching UFC is not your thing, St-Pierre is making his way over to film. He’ll be in two upcoming martial arts films soon. So, when your partner wants to go to the movies- ask if Georges "Rush" Saint-Pierre is the star- and join him, while he is enthralled over the martial arts moves, you can swoon over the body performing them! This born Saint-Isidore, Quebec, Canada, native is often referred to as GSP, a Canadian mixed martial arts fighter and the 2007 UFC Welterweight Champion.

The tattoo on his chest means that there are two sides to him. "I can be very rude and I can be very nice. I like to be rude when I fight," St. Pierre has been quoted to say. I don’t know about you ladies, but he can whisper ‘rude and suggestive’ ideas in my ear, I would even be up for a ‘tussle!’


Kara Elsberry




© Copyright, 2010 Main Street Magazine/Rain Enterprises

As seen in the April Issue of Main Street Magazine.

Printed in Canada, ISSN: 1920-4299 by Rain Enterprises


If you would like to find out how to receive your FREE copy of MSM go to http://www.mainstreetmagazine.net/






Fashion Sense

Fun and Funky Spring

Spring fashion trends for 2010 are extremely diverse and a lot of fun, From the return of funky and flirty tie-dye-there's sure to be some spring 2010 fashion trends here that every girl can pull off:




Customize Your Flip Flops -Use super glue to add items to the straps of flip flops. You could glue on unusual items like matchbook covers from spots your visited on the last vacation, or symbols like peace signs, hearts, and skulls. Use your creativity; there are unlimited ways to make flip flops a funky fashion statement with a tube of superglue and fun items of your choice


Tie-Dye – A sure to be favourite spring fashion trend of 2010 has to be the return of a grown-up version of tie-dye. Gone are the tattered T-shirts of the 60's, replaced by flirty cocktail dresses and chic tunics. Tie-dye will become an art form as one of the biggest spring fashion trends of 2010, with designers turning it from a flower child arts-and-crafts project into a very wearable print suitable for dressier styles. And expect this to be one of the 2010 fashion trends that last well into the summer.

Ripped and torn denim – Just when you were going to throw out those torn jeans! Super short hot pants and boy shorts isn't for everyone, so if you can't pull off showing this much leg, ripped and torn denim jeans are a great way to show a little leg and get some ventilation on hotter days that you don't feel like wearing shorts. This is one of the hot fashion trends of spring 2010 that any girl can pull off, as you can look for the right style of ripped and torn jeans that suits you- skinny jeans, high-waisted jeans, dark jeans, etc.


Warrior Look: Interesting spring fashion trend, one that would really make you stand out from the crowd, and you could have fun with. Think ancient warrior by wearing shirts with metallic details, like chain-mail inspired beading. You could don belts and corsets with metallic details to create a warrior-style look, or go really over-the-top by looking for tops with metal plating or faux metal plating. You might also find necklaces that resemble chain mail, or metallic cuff bracelets with an armor-like look. This is one of the 2010 spring fashion trends that will likely be a hit with celebrities, and it really makes me think "Rihanna". Plus those gladiator sandals in your closet from last year will come in handy!

So from ultra-feminine styles to retro looks
and even some styles that will make you look like you're battle-ready, whatever your tastes in fashion may be, there's sure to be some spring 2010 fashion trends here that will help you do a little spring closet cleaning and have your wardrobe looking as fresh and diverse as all the new flowers outside.

Louise Kana


© Copyright, 2010 Main Street Magazine/Rain Enterprises

As seen in the April Issue of Main Street Magazine.

Printed in Canada, ISSN: 1920-4299 by Rain Enterprises


If you would like to find out how to receive your FREE copy of MSM go to http://www.mainstreetmagazine.net/





Sweet Nothings

The Hardest Thing I Had to Say

It all started when I was 6 years old. While I was playing outside on my farm in California, I met a boy. He was an average kind of boy who teased you and then you chased them and beat them up. After that first meeting in which I beat him up we kept on meeting and beating each other up at the fence. That only lasted for a little while though. We would meet at the fence all the time and we were always together.

I would tell him all my secrets. He was very quiet he would just listen to what I had to say. I found him easy to talk to and I could talk to him about everything. In school we had separate friends but when we got home we would always talk about what happened in school. One day I said to him that a guy I liked hurt me and broke my heart. He just comforted me and said everything would be okay. He gave me words of encouragement and helped me get over him. I was happy and thought of him as a real friend. But I knew that there was something else about him that I liked. I thought of it that night and figured it was just a friend kinda thing that I was feeling.

All through high school and even through graduation we're always together and of course I thought of it as being friends. But I knew deep inside that I really felt differently. On graduation night even though we had different dates to the prom I wanted to be with him. That night after everybody went home I went to his house and wanted to tell him that I wanted to see him. Well, that night was my big chance and all I did was just sit there with him watching the stars and talking about what I was going to do and what he was going to do. I looked into his eyes and listened to him talk about what his dream was. How he wanted to get married and settle down. He said how he wanted to be rich and successful. All I could do was to tell him my dream and cuddle next to him.

I went home hurting because I didn't tell him how I was feeling. I wanted to tell him so bad that I loved him but I was too scared and frightened. I let my feelings go and told myself that someday I would tell him just how I felt. All through college I wanted to tell him but he always had someone with him. After graduation he got a job in New York, I was happy for him but at the same time I was sad to see him go. I was sad also because I didn't tell him how I felt. But I couldn't let him know now that he was leaving for his big job. So I just kept it to myself and watched him go on the plane. I cried as I hugged him for what I felt was going to be the last time. I went home that night and cried my eyes out. I felt hurt that I didn't tell him what I had inside my heart.

Well, I got a job as a secretary and then worked my way to a computer analyst. I was proud of what I had accomplished. One day I got a letter with an invitation to a marriage. It was from him, I was happy and sad at the same time. Now I know that I could never be with him and that we could only be friends. I went to the wedding the next month. It was a big occasion. The big church wedding and the reception at the hotel. I met the bride and of course him. I fell in love one more time. But I held back so it wouldn't spoil what should be the happiest day in his life. I tried to have fun that night but it was killing me inside watching him being so happy and me trying to be happy covering up my sadness tears inside of me.

I left New York feeling that I did the right thing. Before I left on the flight, he came running out of nowhere and said his good-byes and how he was very happy to see me. I came home and just tried to forget about what went on in New York. I had to go on with my life. As the years went on, we wrote to each other on what was going on and how he had missed talking to me. On one occasion he never wrote back to me at all. I was getting worried as to why he hadn't written anything for a long time after I had already written 6 letters to him. Well, just when everything seemed hopeless and sad in my life, I got a note that said: "meet me at the fence where we used to talk about things". I went and saw him there. I was happy to see him, but he was broken-hearted and sad inside. We hugged until we couldn't breathe anymore.

Then he told me about the divorce and why he hadn't written for a long time. He cried until he couldn't cry anymore. Finally, we went back to the house and talked and laughed about what I had been going and to catch up on old times. But in all of this, I couldn't tell him how I felt about him. In the days that followed, he had fun and forgot about all his problem and his divorce. I fell in love again with him. When it came time for him to leave back to New York, I went to see him off and cried. I hated to see him leave. He promised to see me every time he could get a vacation. I couldn't wait for him to come so I could be with him. We would always have fun when we were together.

One day he didn't show up like he said he would. I figured that he might have been busy. The days turned into months and I just forgot about it. Then I got a call one day from a lawyer in New York. The lawyer said that he had died in a car accident going to the airport. And that it took this long till everything was settled. It broke my heart. I was shocked about what took place. Now I knew why he didn't come that day. Again, I was broken-hearted. I cried that night, cried tears of sadness and heartache. Asking questions why did this happen to a kind guy like him?

I gathered my things and went to New York for the reading of his will. Of course, things were given to his family and his ex-wife. I finally got to meet her since the last time we met at the wedding. She explained to me how he was and how he always provided. But he was always unhappy. She would always try everything but she couldn't get him happy, as he was that night at their wedding. When the will was read, the one thing that was given to me was a diary. It was a diary that of his life. I cried as it was given to me. I didn't know what to think. Why was this given to me? I took it and flew back to California. As I flew on the plane I remembered the good times that we had together. I started reading the diary and what was written.

The diary was started with the day we first met. I read on till I started to cry. The diary told of him saying that he had fallen in love with me that day I was broken-hearted. But he was too afraid to tell me what he had felt. That is why he was so quiet and liked to listen to me. It told of how he wanted to tell me so many times, but was too afraid to say anything. It told of when he went to New York and fell in love with another. How the happiest time he had was seeing me and dancing with me at the wedding. He said he imagined it was our wedding. How he was always unhappy till he had no choice but to divorce his wife. How the best time in his life was to read the letters written to him by me. Finally, the diary ended when it said, "today I will tell her I love her". It was the day he was killed. The day I was going to finally find out what was really in his heart.

If you love someone, don't wait till tomorrow to tell him/her. Maybe that next day will never come at all.

~Author Unknown~

As seen in the April Issue of MSM

Copyright © Main Street Magazine

Canadian ISSN: 1920-4299

If you would like to find out how to receive your FREE copy of MSM go to www.mainstreetmagazine.net

Moving Forward

Love Is Found Within Yourself

How ironic some spend their lives searching, risking, building, and maintaining relationships; with people whom before that glance across the bar or brush of a shoulder where complete strangers. And yet with a blink of an eye rules are infringed; loyalty, commitment, truth, trust, monogamy, and yet we never once think of presenting those rules to the one true unconditional love of our lives, our selves. When have you ever uttered, "I will be honest and respectful of you? I will never put another before you or compromise what we have for another. You are priceless and irreplaceable." And it was your own reflection staring back at you.

Instead, you may surround yourself with distractions in order to avoid a silent uninterrupted moment where a conversation such as this runs the risk of taking place. You've become that Friday night die-hard loyal patron at the local watering hole. Sucking in you gut, rationing your oxygen and calorie intake, never having to compromise your socially pressured physic. Polished, waxed, glossed, streaked, all while standing on your tippy toes hip to hip in a crowded bar surrounded by your peers with whom you have only one thing in common, "Every one is avoiding themselves."

Engulfed in meaningless conversation night after night hoping it'll lead up to what unceasingly turns into meaningless intimacy, and in the morning you're face to face with the last person you wanted to be alone with, yourself. The one that you've been avoiding will always be there for you, love, care, and never abandon you, yet they are the last to be acknowledged. Everything and everyone else is put first and when that falls apart you are left with emptiness, a gashing hole created by constantly giving to everyone except yourself.

You don't have to search outward for love. Each of us has an infinite abundance of love with in ourselves. Once this knowledge rings true and the belief is reflected in all you do, you will no longer see yourself as anything but perfectly whole. Love will no longer be sought in the reflection of your admirers, but in the vision of your own eyes. Make the commitment to be the priority in your own life, to see yourself as perfect, whole and complete. You are the only power in your world and you create the life that you decide to live, everything else and every one else is present because you have chosen them to be. Reclaiming your own power and loving yourself eliminates meaningless conversations and situations. They will no longer be appealing. You are one less loyal victim on a Friday night. You are a reflection of love.

Angel Al-Homsi


As seen in the April Issue of MSM

Copyright © Main Street Magazine

Canadian ISSN: 1920-4299

If you would like to find out how to receive your FREE copy of MSM go to http://www.mainstreetmagazine.net/



The Entrepreneur - Survival Tips

These tips can help you deal with the stresses of self-employment or starting a business... or just everyday life.


We all deal with a certain amount of stress every day. Just getting out of bed can sometimes be a stressful event. But starting a business
and running a business is one of the most stressful things you can do, and you may find yourself feeling overwhelmed and overloaded. After a period of time running at that high level of stress, the body begins to break down and be unable to function properly. We get clumsy, forgetful, and short-tempered. We develop short-term physical problems like headaches and neck strain. And when the immune system starts to fail, we find ourselves getting colds and the flu and other physical ailments.

Stress is really a combination of symptoms. It's a pile-up, a train wreck of feelings, all colliding
and compounding each other and sending our body into a tailspin. Physically, overloading with stress is literally like being trapped in a constant state of "fight or flight", and the chemicals released into the body can do a great deal of damage.

In How Stress Effects Neurotransmitters, Bev Storer explains

The brain uses feel-good transmitters called endorphins when managing daily stress. When the brain requires larger amounts of endorphins to handle increased stress, the ratio of many of the other transmitters, one to another, becomes upset creating a chemical imbalance. We begin to feel stress more acutely -- a sense of urgency and anxiety creates even more stress. As a result, harmful chemicals are released in our bodies that may do damage, causing more stress. This vicious cycle is called the "stress cycle."

So how can we beat the effects of stress before it becomes a critical chemical situation in our bodies?

If you ate something that backlogged your system, you'd suffer the results of constipation. Your entire system would feel the effects of poisons that should have been eliminated. It's the same with backlogged emotions. When you don't let them out, they build up. Body can't hold all that energy without something going wrong.

When you begin to feel sick, your body is telling you you've got something building up that needs release.

The first step is to acknowledge what you're feeling!

Some causes of stress:

  • Fear of failure
  • Fear of confrontation
  • Feeling inadequate or stupid
  • Anger at other's stupidity
  • Fear of other's disapproval
  • Frustration (which is really anger suppressed)
    • a goal or desire seems unreachable
    • things aren't going your way
    • people keep saying NO
    • other demands or responsibilities keep you from doing what you want
  • Too many demands on you are stretching you too thin
  • Fear of rejection
  • Fear of loss of security
  • Fear of loss of love

Probably the most damaging of is the fear of fear. Many people view fear as a sign of weakness. Strong people aren't afraid, right? Wrong. That's just so much BS. This judgement against feelings is long and pervasive in our culture. If you don't feel and acknowledge your anger and fear, they build up. The emotions are part of us, they shouldn't be ignored. Like undigested food, eventually they begin to poison the body and symptoms of stress begin to manifest themselves. Edginess, inability to sleep, headaches, irritability, persistent neck or back aches, stomach problems. Your body is telling you there's a problem.

Start by noticing what you feel. Watch yourself as you move through your day. Pay attention, not just to your emotions, but to your body as well. Notice when your neck begins to really hurt, or what's going on around you when you begin to feel like screaming. Later, take some quiet time to remember these moments. Remember
and let yourself sink down into the feelings. Often one feeling is masking another. Irritability often masks fear of some kind, for instance. Try to find the most "core" feeling, if you can. Those are the feelings that need your attention the most. If you've been suppressing them, they've had to "go underground", and they can't speak to you directly. That's why they either masquerade as other feelings, or manifest through the body in pain and illness.

You know what you're feeling... now what?

By listening to your feelings,
and giving them their due, you can give them a chance to express before they manifest in your body. By express I don't mean mentalizing or rationalizing. Believe it or not, your feelings have a life of their own, and a right to be. They need to express - in sound or movement or tears. You may not like your own fears, you may wish they would just go away, but until you give them expression, they won't... they'll just build up in your system, compounding and compacting and resulting in symptoms of stress.

Starting my own home business is one of the most stressful things I've ever done. I took the advice of the experts
and started working on my ideas while I still had a full-time job. Even so, I could feel the fears begin to build. What if I quit my job and then couldn't get any clients? What if I failed? Fear of loss of security was (IS!) a huge problem for me - I had always had a steady pay check and the thought of being without that security was terrifying.

I spent 6-8 months preparing for the BIG step by:

  • Laying the groundwork for my home business - researching and gathering materials
  • Dealing with the fears that surfaced

For a while I could only take baby-steps. I'd do something for my business ideas, and then I'd go have a good cry. By the time I was ready to quit my job, but the fear wasn't overwhelming.

Stress Busters:

There are some things you can do that can help prevent stresses from piling up
and becoming a train wreck. In the article 10 Steps to DeStress, Pam Woods gives 10 good preventive measures like setting boundaries, learning to say no, and working at a job you love that lay the groundwork for a stress-free life. Or at least, minimal stress. But these steps are still only the groundwork. And life has a funny way of building up on us and suddenly, you're in the middle of a pileup. No matter what preparations we make, we still have to have ways of dealing with the stresses when they come up. We have to have ways of dealing with the feelings.

  • Laughter: Watch a funny movie - have a good laugh. Laughter, like crying, releases chemicals in your brain that will make you feel good and give you the ability to cope with whatever may come.
  • Tears: Have a good cry - take a pillow and a box of Kleenex, close the door and let yourself howl. This may not be easy at first, especially if you've spent your adult life suppressing your feelings. But it's worse to allow your fears to come up and then NOT allow them to express. That's like inviting a bull to stomp on your head for a while. When you start to listen to your feelings, they will WANT to express. If you sit quietly with them (and give yourself permission to express whatever they are), your feelings will take over and begin to flow out of you on their own.
  • Physical Activity: Take a brisk walk or do some vigorous exercise - physical activity helps release the energy that's tied up in your body, and gets those endorphins flowing. Pound on something - chop wood, beat a rug, dig a hole.
  • Deep Relaxation: Listen to soothing music. Practice some of the body relaxation techniques in meditation. Breathe deeply, and mentally talk to your body, one part at a time. Relax, let go. I have even made myself a relaxation tape which I can use to help me get into a deeply relaxed state.
  • Imagine worst case scenarios - Most fears culminate in a fear of death. This may seem radical, but really when it gets down to it, what is the fear, really? Lack of money? What happens if you have no money? You lose your house, perhaps (fear of loss of security)... your spouse leaves you (fear of loss of love)... you starve ... and die. Sometimes if you take your fear all the way to the natural conclusion you'll find that it's really not so overwhelming. So, what's the worse that could happen? You die? Usually by this point in my imaginings, I'm laughing at myself. And laughter is a GREAT stress buster.
  • Change Your Routine: If you usually get the kids off to school and then settle in to your business/work, change it! Instead, take a hot bath, exercise, and spend a few moments in deep relaxation. Then get to work.
  • Plan You’re Time: Starting a home business will consume a lot of your time. If you have a family and are still holding a full or part time job, you'll need to plan your time carefully. Figure out how much time you can give to your business each day, or each week. You may want to sit down with your family and let them know how important this new venture is to you. Get their feedback and agreement on how much time will be spent with them, and how much on your business. This way, they have participation in your process and won't feel so left out when you're working on your business stuff. If money will be tight, get their ideas on how you can all budget for a while, until your business is thriving.
  • Feed your heart: One of the best stress-busters is simply doing something you love. If you find the business of crafting is getting too stressful, leave the business side for a while and just do a project you enjoy for the love of it. Do something to please your own heart. When my business becomes too stressful, I often go into the garden and play in the dirt for a while. I water something that doesn't need watering, I weed and plant and smell the earth. I play with my dogs and get far away from the business stuff for a while. Then, with my heart fed, I am more able to deal with the stress of my business, and things don't bother me as much.

Give yourself time to ease into self-employment slowly. Listen to your feelings and your body, and the stresses of working for yourself won't become so very overwhelming.

~Christine Torres~

As seen in the April Issue of MSM

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